Killer??
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Madii | Date: Tuesday, 2012-09-11, 9:20 PM | Message # 1 |
Good RP'er
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| I go out to the street, and this car goes by. There is a man driving. he takes out a gun, and shoots it. It Hit me in the arm i drop down e shuts agan it hits (someone u love alot) in the chest and kills them you know this person he did it to some of ur friends to do u want revenge? so you and ur friends get together and go after him..........(form plot as go along??)
*cs* Name Gender age apperince bio do u want revenge skill(only one) other What love one did it hit and kill?
Please comment to help it get better did it of the top of my head haha(:
Hey! im madi ya thats it!! haha(:
Message edited by Madii - Tuesday, 2012-09-11, 9:20 PM |
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Kenzieroo | Date: Tuesday, 2012-09-11, 9:57 PM | Message # 2 |
From the Forest
Group: Moderators
Messages: 7524
Status: Offline
| (Grammar would help... More details would also be nice. And sometimes a developing plot is good, but I think this needs more structure. No offense.)
On The Edge Of Imagination And Logic
Message edited by Kenzieroo - Wednesday, 2012-09-12, 9:41 AM |
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Demon | Date: Wednesday, 2012-09-12, 2:27 PM | Message # 3 |
※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| (Agreed. And don't use run-on sentences, try to space out your paragraphs with commas and periods.)
ಠ_ಠ (づ  ̄ ³ ̄)づ um
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Madii | Date: Wednesday, 2012-09-12, 5:21 PM | Message # 4 |
Good RP'er
Group: Checked
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| ya sorry i wrote it fast so, can i edit it?
Hey! im madi ya thats it!! haha(:
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Demon | Date: Wednesday, 2012-09-12, 5:35 PM | Message # 5 |
※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| (Yeah definetly. No need to ask. By the way, when talking OOC, use parentheses please (: )
ಠ_ಠ (づ  ̄ ³ ̄)づ um
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Madii | Date: Wednesday, 2012-09-12, 7:20 PM | Message # 6 |
Good RP'er
Group: Checked
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| (ok how do i edit it?)
Hey! im madi ya thats it!! haha(:
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Kenzieroo | Date: Wednesday, 2012-09-12, 7:36 PM | Message # 7 |
From the Forest
Group: Moderators
Messages: 7524
Status: Offline
| (Look at the lower right hand corner and click edit.)
On The Edge Of Imagination And Logic
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Madii | Date: Wednesday, 2012-09-12, 9:01 PM | Message # 8 |
Good RP'er
Group: Checked
Messages: 80
Status: Offline
| (ok thanks i cant do right now but i will as soon as i can)
Hey! im madi ya thats it!! haha(:
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Kenzieroo | Date: Wednesday, 2012-09-12, 9:23 PM | Message # 9 |
From the Forest
Group: Moderators
Messages: 7524
Status: Offline
| (We'll be waiting.)
On The Edge Of Imagination And Logic
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Equinox | Date: Thursday, 2012-09-13, 8:27 PM | Message # 10 |
Social warrior of the administration
Group: Administrators
Messages: 7183
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| (I've got extra time, I'll buff up some spelling real quick.)
~Glacial Malphite: The Shard of the Monolith~
"I hear rumors that the Shard of the Monolith is an unstoppable force. They aren't rumors."-Nausus, on the topic of Malphite's arrival.
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Kenzieroo | Date: Friday, 2012-09-14, 8:07 AM | Message # 11 |
From the Forest
Group: Moderators
Messages: 7524
Status: Offline
| (I didn't even add any extra details and it's starting to look a lot better. But it still needs details.) I go out to the street, and this car goes by. There is a man driving. he takes out a gun, and shoots it. It hit me in the arm, I drop down and he shoots again. it hits [Someone you love a lot] in the chest and kills them. You know this person he did it to some of your friends too. Do you want revenge? So you and your friends get together and go after him...
*CS* Name: Age: Gender: Appearance: Skill(Only one): Bio(At lest add revenge or no): Loved one?: Other:
On The Edge Of Imagination And Logic
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Madii | Date: Sunday, 2012-09-16, 2:08 PM | Message # 12 |
Good RP'er
Group: Checked
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| It will not let me edit it
Hey! im madi ya thats it!! haha(:
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Kenzieroo | Date: Sunday, 2012-09-16, 2:23 PM | Message # 13 |
From the Forest
Group: Moderators
Messages: 7524
Status: Offline
| (You waited to long.)
On The Edge Of Imagination And Logic
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Madii | Date: Sunday, 2012-09-16, 2:32 PM | Message # 14 |
Good RP'er
Group: Checked
Messages: 80
Status: Offline
| What do u mean?
Hey! im madi ya thats it!! haha(:
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Jigajig | Date: Sunday, 2012-09-16, 2:33 PM | Message # 15 |
Famous RP'er
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| (You waited to long so you can no longer edit the post.)
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