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~/\Mythology Survival/\~ (My Second Roleplay)
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| Supernerd | Date: Friday, 2011-09-30, 7:13 PM | Message # 1 |
 A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| Most people dont believe in mythology....most people think its just a joke, a simple thought that somebody just made up, just so they can have a couple laughs!...Hehe, It does give me a laugh, if only they knew...They are real, Vampires, Werewolves, Dragons, all of it, and who am i to state such an opinion? I am one; one, that i shall not say...I only have one thing to say, If you become one...then lets just say life sucks for you. All of the problems there are...We're almost as ignorant as those humans...we have wars, sure, we have enemies, friends, truces, but most just try to survive...from ourselves.
~ Human Character Sheet~
Gender:
Name:
Age:
Description:
Bio:
~Vampire Character Sheet~
Gender:
Name:
Age:
Description:
Bio:
Wings?(optional):
How long have you been a vampire?:
~Werewolf Character Sheet~
Gender:
Name:
Age:
Description:
Wolf Description:
How long have you been a Werewolf?:
~Other Character Sheet~ (please send a message about what your "other" is for approval)
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Reviews
~Equinox~
Story:3/5
I understand that it's a survival of the fittest story, but it needed more detail honestly. Maybe the goal is to gather and unite all brethren and enemies together, to take back the modern world from the humans? Something? It needs some kind of goal for the story, and overall.... more story!
Grammar:3/5
Honestly, were all those periods necessary? It needed some spacing and less periods, and if you plan on someone talking, for it to have quotations marks around it, but overall, you did pretty well. You capitalized most words, you gave a bit of a back story on the guy at least, which made it more interesting to read. But honestly, those periods everywhere costed you a whole point.
Character detail:3.2/5
I like the way you mysteriously developed the speaker in the story, but also your own character description is pretty excellent itself, along with the CS. 3.2 seems like a close vote.
Plot Development:2/5
Not too much of a plot, but it had SOME development, thus it deserves SOME points.
Overall rating:3.5/5
Honestly, this is my complete and honest input here. It's pretty good for your first one in a long time, but it needs a good bit of work. Don't worry, all great writers will always need to improve somehow.
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Demon | Date: Wednesday, 2011-10-05, 8:35 PM | Message # 166 |
 ※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| (I need Zy to respond .______.)
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
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| Supernerd | Date: Wednesday, 2011-10-05, 10:13 PM | Message # 167 |
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A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| (not exactly..he doesnt need to respond, yu more like said than asked to stick my his side.)
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Zyphon | Date: Thursday, 2011-10-06, 5:44 AM | Message # 168 |
 The Flying Penguin
Group: Administrators
Messages: 100536
Status: Offline
| ~~Dark~~
I shrugged. "That works."
Flying Penguins
The world would be a better place if they existed.
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| Demon | Date: Thursday, 2011-10-06, 1:55 PM | Message # 169 |
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※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| "Good." I nodded.
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
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| Supernerd | Date: Thursday, 2011-10-06, 6:05 PM | Message # 170 |
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A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| i went inside the castle, and took a left, then went down a flight of stairs, then another, then another, then i took a left, ignoring the warning signs...I was desperate, and it was also risky as hell, i opened the door and went to a chest, inside, i opened the chest and grabbed a vial..being careful not to break it on me...i smirked..staring at the label, showing "Holy Water.....this should do it...i hope."
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Demon | Date: Thursday, 2011-10-06, 6:10 PM | Message # 171 |
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※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| (Awww shit)
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
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| Supernerd | Date: Thursday, 2011-10-06, 6:52 PM | Message # 172 |
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A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| (yeah..i also have a feeling zyphons gonna say "Why would there be holy water in a vampire place?" well this is whhyyy When vampires kill priests, or anybody else that has holy water, they bring into the castle so no one can use it against them..)
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Supernerd | Date: Thursday, 2011-10-06, 6:53 PM | Message # 173 |
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A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| (Oh yeah, i said the sun was coming up...just to let you know)
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Demon | Date: Thursday, 2011-10-06, 7:05 PM | Message # 174 |
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※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| I saw the sun coming up. "Damn...."
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
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| Equinox | Date: Thursday, 2011-10-06, 7:19 PM | Message # 175 |
 Social warrior of the administration
Group: Administrators
Messages: 7183
Status: Offline
| (And now that I think about it, as long as the grass that soaked up the holy water survived, wouldn't just touching that grass be lethal? Bad thoughts lead to better outcomes.)
(HOLY WATER TSUNAMI.)
I landed outside the Junk dealer's shop.
"ERIC! I'VE COME TO COLLECT WHAT I AM OWED! OPEN UP OR I'M COMING IN!"
(Waiting, because shit's about to get real.)
~Glacial Malphite: The Shard of the Monolith~
"I hear rumors that the Shard of the Monolith is an unstoppable force. They aren't rumors."-Nausus, on the topic of Malphite's arrival.
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| Supernerd | Date: Thursday, 2011-10-06, 11:08 PM | Message # 176 |
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A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| (Ok..XD Also, could you maybe rate my roleplay? ) ((Please be honest))
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Equinox | Date: Friday, 2011-10-07, 7:51 AM | Message # 177 |
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Social warrior of the administration
Group: Administrators
Messages: 7183
Status: Offline
| (Always will be when it comes to ratings my friend.)
~Glacial Malphite: The Shard of the Monolith~
"I hear rumors that the Shard of the Monolith is an unstoppable force. They aren't rumors."-Nausus, on the topic of Malphite's arrival.
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| Spark | Date: Friday, 2011-10-07, 10:43 AM | Message # 178 |
 Zyphon's Supporter
Group: Checked
Messages: 2416
Status: Offline
| Gender:F
Name: Cane
Age: 19
Description: In link.
Wolf Description: Second link.
How long have you been a Werewolf?: 15years.
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.
After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."
Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.
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| Zyphon | Date: Friday, 2011-10-07, 1:40 PM | Message # 179 |
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The Flying Penguin
Group: Administrators
Messages: 100536
Status: Offline
| (Sunlight won't burn me. :3)
(Although Holy Water would still kill me ._.)
(btw, I wasn't going to ask why Holy Water is in a vampire place. If you want to kill a werewolf, then you've got to have stuff like silver or holy water.)
Flying Penguins
The world would be a better place if they existed.
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| Demon | Date: Friday, 2011-10-07, 2:31 PM | Message # 180 |
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※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| I stood up, shaking off my fur. "Well, I'll be in my cave if you need me" I mumbled.
I had a sudden, irritating urge... Damn, this urge was annoying...
I swung my head back, letting out a hauntingly beautiful howl.
I returned normal, and stalked off to my cave.
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
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