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~/\Mythology Survival/\~ (My Second Roleplay)
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| Supernerd | Date: Friday, 2011-09-30, 7:13 PM | Message # 1 |
 A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| Most people dont believe in mythology....most people think its just a joke, a simple thought that somebody just made up, just so they can have a couple laughs!...Hehe, It does give me a laugh, if only they knew...They are real, Vampires, Werewolves, Dragons, all of it, and who am i to state such an opinion? I am one; one, that i shall not say...I only have one thing to say, If you become one...then lets just say life sucks for you. All of the problems there are...We're almost as ignorant as those humans...we have wars, sure, we have enemies, friends, truces, but most just try to survive...from ourselves.
~ Human Character Sheet~
Gender:
Name:
Age:
Description:
Bio:
~Vampire Character Sheet~
Gender:
Name:
Age:
Description:
Bio:
Wings?(optional):
How long have you been a vampire?:
~Werewolf Character Sheet~
Gender:
Name:
Age:
Description:
Wolf Description:
How long have you been a Werewolf?:
~Other Character Sheet~ (please send a message about what your "other" is for approval)
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Reviews
~Equinox~
Story:3/5
I understand that it's a survival of the fittest story, but it needed more detail honestly. Maybe the goal is to gather and unite all brethren and enemies together, to take back the modern world from the humans? Something? It needs some kind of goal for the story, and overall.... more story!
Grammar:3/5
Honestly, were all those periods necessary? It needed some spacing and less periods, and if you plan on someone talking, for it to have quotations marks around it, but overall, you did pretty well. You capitalized most words, you gave a bit of a back story on the guy at least, which made it more interesting to read. But honestly, those periods everywhere costed you a whole point.
Character detail:3.2/5
I like the way you mysteriously developed the speaker in the story, but also your own character description is pretty excellent itself, along with the CS. 3.2 seems like a close vote.
Plot Development:2/5
Not too much of a plot, but it had SOME development, thus it deserves SOME points.
Overall rating:3.5/5
Honestly, this is my complete and honest input here. It's pretty good for your first one in a long time, but it needs a good bit of work. Don't worry, all great writers will always need to improve somehow.
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Equinox | Date: Friday, 2011-10-07, 5:25 PM | Message # 181 |
 Social warrior of the administration
Group: Administrators
Messages: 7183
Status: Offline
| (I bet I could kill a werewolf with garlic though.)
(Simply ram it far down it's throat and keep hitting it on the head until it chokes to death.)
(Garlic kill.)
~Glacial Malphite: The Shard of the Monolith~
"I hear rumors that the Shard of the Monolith is an unstoppable force. They aren't rumors."-Nausus, on the topic of Malphite's arrival.
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| Demon | Date: Friday, 2011-10-07, 5:48 PM | Message # 182 |
 ※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| (.......)
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
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| Supernerd | Date: Friday, 2011-10-07, 9:37 PM | Message # 183 |
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A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| (But equinox, once again, i am a hater too XD im a hater/friend, sooo...i have my reasons XD Also, will you be sending me it or just saying it on here?) ((I really wont get upset, i personally think mine is quite crappy, but this was just to revive roleplaying, and my sense of roleplaying too, like, when i said description, i really meant appearance, it was just that i am quite rusty...)
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Demon | Date: Saturday, 2011-10-08, 7:19 AM | Message # 184 |
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※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| (>___<)
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
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| Supernerd | Date: Saturday, 2011-10-08, 10:08 AM | Message # 185 |
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A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| (Oh yeah, accepted spark)
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Equinox | Date: Saturday, 2011-10-08, 10:42 AM | Message # 186 |
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Social warrior of the administration
Group: Administrators
Messages: 7183
Status: Offline
| (It's at the bottom of your OP.)
~Glacial Malphite: The Shard of the Monolith~
"I hear rumors that the Shard of the Monolith is an unstoppable force. They aren't rumors."-Nausus, on the topic of Malphite's arrival.
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| Demon | Date: Saturday, 2011-10-08, 11:57 AM | Message # 187 |
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※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| (This story is going nowhere at this point .____.)
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
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| Spark | Date: Saturday, 2011-10-08, 12:00 PM | Message # 188 |
 Zyphon's Supporter
Group: Checked
Messages: 2416
Status: Offline
| (Wait. It isn't done yet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
(Where are you)
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.
After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."
Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.
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| Demon | Date: Saturday, 2011-10-08, 12:01 PM | Message # 189 |
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※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| (Im headed for a really tall mountain, where my cave is. Its sunrise right now)
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
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| Zyphon | Date: Saturday, 2011-10-08, 1:01 PM | Message # 190 |
 The Flying Penguin
Group: Administrators
Messages: 100536
Status: Offline
| (I'm... At a place. ._.)
Flying Penguins
The world would be a better place if they existed.
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| Spark | Date: Saturday, 2011-10-08, 3:26 PM | Message # 191 |
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Zyphon's Supporter
Group: Checked
Messages: 2416
Status: Offline
| (Time to meet demon!)
Cane/Caine
I was walking towards a tall mountain. I tried to ignore the birds.... so I kept looking foward.
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.
After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."
Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.
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| Demon | Date: Saturday, 2011-10-08, 3:47 PM | Message # 192 |
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※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| I stretched my wings, and flew to my cave. The strong wind whipped at my fur.
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
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| Supernerd | Date: Saturday, 2011-10-08, 11:50 PM | Message # 193 |
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A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| (Yeah its cause im waiting for you guys to get to cover...)
I looked out the window of the castle...staring at the sun, slowly slipping the holy water into my front pocket..."Brisk...." I chuckled softly.
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Zyphon | Date: Sunday, 2011-10-09, 5:02 AM | Message # 194 |
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The Flying Penguin
Group: Administrators
Messages: 100536
Status: Offline
| ~~Dark~~
I watched her go in the cave.
"...Right, I'll just stay here I suppose."
Flying Penguins
The world would be a better place if they existed.
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| Demon | Date: Sunday, 2011-10-09, 7:23 AM | Message # 195 |
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※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| (Need to wait for Spark)
I had a feeling that something bad was about to happen... Something really, REALLY bad.
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
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