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~/\Mythology Survival/\~ (My Second Roleplay)
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| Supernerd | Date: Friday, 2011-09-30, 7:13 PM | Message # 1 |
 A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| Most people dont believe in mythology....most people think its just a joke, a simple thought that somebody just made up, just so they can have a couple laughs!...Hehe, It does give me a laugh, if only they knew...They are real, Vampires, Werewolves, Dragons, all of it, and who am i to state such an opinion? I am one; one, that i shall not say...I only have one thing to say, If you become one...then lets just say life sucks for you. All of the problems there are...We're almost as ignorant as those humans...we have wars, sure, we have enemies, friends, truces, but most just try to survive...from ourselves.
~ Human Character Sheet~
Gender:
Name:
Age:
Description:
Bio:
~Vampire Character Sheet~
Gender:
Name:
Age:
Description:
Bio:
Wings?(optional):
How long have you been a vampire?:
~Werewolf Character Sheet~
Gender:
Name:
Age:
Description:
Wolf Description:
How long have you been a Werewolf?:
~Other Character Sheet~ (please send a message about what your "other" is for approval)
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Reviews
~Equinox~
Story:3/5
I understand that it's a survival of the fittest story, but it needed more detail honestly. Maybe the goal is to gather and unite all brethren and enemies together, to take back the modern world from the humans? Something? It needs some kind of goal for the story, and overall.... more story!
Grammar:3/5
Honestly, were all those periods necessary? It needed some spacing and less periods, and if you plan on someone talking, for it to have quotations marks around it, but overall, you did pretty well. You capitalized most words, you gave a bit of a back story on the guy at least, which made it more interesting to read. But honestly, those periods everywhere costed you a whole point.
Character detail:3.2/5
I like the way you mysteriously developed the speaker in the story, but also your own character description is pretty excellent itself, along with the CS. 3.2 seems like a close vote.
Plot Development:2/5
Not too much of a plot, but it had SOME development, thus it deserves SOME points.
Overall rating:3.5/5
Honestly, this is my complete and honest input here. It's pretty good for your first one in a long time, but it needs a good bit of work. Don't worry, all great writers will always need to improve somehow.
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Supernerd | Date: Sunday, 2011-10-09, 10:13 AM | Message # 196 |
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A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| (I have to wait for spark too i guess...XD)
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Supernerd | Date: Sunday, 2011-10-09, 10:16 AM | Message # 197 |
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A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| (lol i saw the review, yeah, i guess i did get carried away with the periods XD)
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Demon | Date: Sunday, 2011-10-09, 4:04 PM | Message # 198 |
 ※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| (Ofcourse, Spark comes online and RP's on every thread shes in, BUT this one.)
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
um
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| Supernerd | Date: Monday, 2011-10-10, 0:13 AM | Message # 199 |
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A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| (ikr?)
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Demon | Date: Monday, 2011-10-10, 6:51 AM | Message # 200 |
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※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| (.____________________________.)
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
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| Supernerd | Date: Monday, 2011-10-10, 9:30 AM | Message # 201 |
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A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| (OMG SPARK!)
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Spark | Date: Monday, 2011-10-10, 9:30 AM | Message # 202 |
 Zyphon's Supporter
Group: Checked
Messages: 2416
Status: Offline
| (VERRY SORRY.)
Cane
I started to walk faster towards the mountain, seeing something fly into it. I couldn't stop.
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.
After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."
Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.
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| Supernerd | Date: Monday, 2011-10-10, 9:31 AM | Message # 203 |
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A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| (How about you take cover first...XD)
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Demon | Date: Monday, 2011-10-10, 9:31 AM | Message # 204 |
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※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| I landed on my cliff, and looked down. Something was approaching... And fast. I bared my fangs, and they gleamed brightly in the night.
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
um
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| Supernerd | Date: Monday, 2011-10-10, 9:34 AM | Message # 205 |
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A Hater/Friend of Equinox
Group: Special
Messages: 3145
Status: Offline
| (Its becoming daytime... >_>)
Some say its nice to have good signatures....
Well.
.....
There you have it.
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| Spark | Date: Monday, 2011-10-10, 9:39 AM | Message # 206 |
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Zyphon's Supporter
Group: Checked
Messages: 2416
Status: Offline
| Cane
VAMPIRE! Shouted my instincts. I was running as fast as your normal wolf.
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.
After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."
Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.
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| Demon | Date: Monday, 2011-10-10, 9:41 AM | Message # 207 |
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※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| (Fine. In the sunrise. Is that better? XD)
(Spark, if you didnt know, just to hold back confusion, Im a werepyree. (If you didnt know XD))
I growled as the figures speed picked up pace.
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
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| Spark | Date: Monday, 2011-10-10, 9:46 AM | Message # 208 |
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Zyphon's Supporter
Group: Checked
Messages: 2416
Status: Offline
| Cane
I growl. I come to a stop, slamming into the mountain like a moron.
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.
After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."
Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.
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| Demon | Date: Monday, 2011-10-10, 9:48 AM | Message # 209 |
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※You shouldnt anger me. ಠ_ಠ※
Group: Administrators
Messages: 9627
Status: Offline
| I sighed, closing my mouth. "This ones a moron.. Great"
ಠ_ಠ (づ ￣ ³￣)づ
um
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| Spark | Date: Monday, 2011-10-10, 9:54 AM | Message # 210 |
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Zyphon's Supporter
Group: Checked
Messages: 2416
Status: Offline
| Cane
I fall backwards. "Hehehehehehehehehe!"
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.
After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."
Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.
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